bleach:KON~ alones

Thursday, January 21, 2010

I lost a friend.

Where did I go wrong,

I lost a friend,

Somewhere along the bitterness,

And I,

Would have stayed up with you all night,

Had I known,

How to save a life.

That song perfectly represents what I feel now. Its been my favourite song for days, and now after what happened, it seems that I can't stop listening to it. I've fallen into life's trap. I got into a quick, short, fun friendship, and it ended. We were friends for barely three months, and it ended just like that. And you know what? It wasn't over a fight. It was just over a talk, and my friend just .. Told me that she couldn't face me anymore.

I should be sad, but I don't know why I'm not. I just feel extremely empty. Like a chunk of me got blown away, ya know? Past the initial shock and all that. It was too bad we couldn't of been friends for longer.

If you're reading this;

You were one of the best friends I ever had, and I'm sad to see you go.

I won't stop you though. Go and have fun with your future friends, and current ones. :D

Have a good life.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I asked if it was possible if we could be friends again, even though I already know the answer. I don't know why I harbour these false hopes. I know friends come and go but .. This was one friend I rather not have lost.

Sigh, I'm sorry for sounding so negative for these past few days guys. Its just too much for me to take in at one time. To my readers, I'm really, really, really sorry a hundred times over.

posted at : 5:17 AM

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Hey guys!

You know how I've always been immature in school? The loud guy who never lays off his jokes, even sometimes on people who can't take any. -Ouch-

Well, I thought I'd actually want to put this somewhere so I can stop thinking about it. I'm 13, guys. I'm much, more mature than you think I am sometimes, but I only show it during the appropriate situations. There's no point being mature in a crowd of immature bastards.

It brings me down to this song by Bon Jovi, titled "Its My Life". Then it goes down to this verse, namely the chorus; Its my life, its not or never, I ain't gonna live forever, I just wanna live when I'm alive. Its my life.

There you go, I'm 13. I want to live out my childhood properly. I want to, next time when my children scold their children from being childish, to be able to look my grandchildren in the eye and say "Yes, Grandpa was very immature when he was young." I don't want to tell them "No, Grandpa was a very serious boy in his work and he did not have any fun as a kid."

Sigh, after saying all this, I don't even feel like blogging anymore. Sorry for the long delay guys, bye.

posted at : 12:55 AM

Thursday, January 14, 2010

I lied.

Yeah, I lied about posting something interesting this time around. Well, at least I've got one link now. I'm too lazy to go searching around and link all of my friends. Then again, I've always been lazy.

Its happening again, guys .. The moodswings and all the sadness. I don't know where most of it is coming from, but I know definitely where one part of it is. I couldn't sleep last night, so I just laid there and thought about stuff. It was when the cold, hard truth really hit me.

I'm quite alone.

I know, I hang around those few guys at recess everyday, but not all of them are what I would call my true friends. A few of them I really find similar in terms of interest and opinion with me, and those would actually count as my true friends.

Coming to girls .. Sigh.

I used to have a few, then we slowly fell out of contact and pretty much stopped talking to each other. I'm sure some of them think me as a friend, but we don't really get much chance to talk and actually communicate. And as for some of those .. Well, lets just say that the previous post sums it up?

I don't know why, I just wished that she didn't have that weird habit. Maybe the rift isn't due to that, but I know it partially is. And even then, it comforts me to think that I know the reason. I always try to make conversation, but it always happens at the wrong time, and she's busy. I always try to care and ask about things whenever something is wrong, but it appears she isn't willing to open up.

Perhaps, from the start it was always my wishful thinking that we could become close friends.

On a happier note .. Wait, there isn't a happier note. Fuck that.

The day was pretty mundane, though the classes were quite fun.

We had a diagnostic test for Literature, and I thought it was pretty easy, though the questions were a little too generic for my liking. Musics, we banged away at keyboards trying to pull up a small string of starting notes for our advertisement jingle. Recess, the same. Ate with See Wei, Yu Hong, Yu Chuan, Zhi Yang, Justyne and Geralyn. We had Science in Tutorial Room 4, since our Projector broke, and you know whats funny? The one in Tutorial Room 4 isn't working too. Owned. History .. Same old stuff with Mrs Law, and Acc was okay, if not a bit annoying. I mean, the teacher's trying to teach and share with us a story or two of his school life, but the guys at the back are talking and chatting away amongst themselves, rather loudly, in fact. I don't care if you guys don't respect the teacher, but please shut the fuck up and spare a thought for your other classmates.

What a clusterfuck some of the guys in 2A are.

One of these guys are seriously annoying and immature. My New Year's resolution had to be changed to NOT bashing this guy into bits even after he's dead. Seriously.

He told me "Oh shit! I didn't do my homework again! I don't want green form so early in the year leh!" I then told him to do his homework. Guess what he replied? Yep. "I don't want to do .."

Fuck, if you can't handle the consequences, don't start shit for yourself.

Nearly got caught for being online just now. I showed mum my gmail account and she was convinced that I was doing something educational and instead just chided me about not telling her that I was going to go online. That is the scariness of motherfucking parents putting their children on a leash.

End rant, hopefully the rift between me and her can be closed up again so I don't get any of this angstyness.

posted at : 12:03 AM

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Sucks eh?

Well, didnt blog yesterday because I was simply too lazy.

Does that count as an excuse?

Okay, thanks.

Wait what, did you say no?

K, suck it up, thanks.

School pretty much sucked yesterday. There weren't any fun lessons, not at all. Worst of all, two periods of chinese lessons. FUCK! Classes were stupid too, especially with those three guys in my class. One of them can be okay sometimes, but the others are plain, plain immature.

The girls in my class, are pretty okay. There aren't much pretty ones in them. Most of them are pretty .. Bleah. Well, I can get along with some, and there are some that are actually too quiet for me to get along well with. I like 'em all lively and fun-loving .. Sigh, it reminds me of someone in 1E who's in another class now. Too bad we didn't really manage to become that close of friends, eh?

Much, much regrets in 1E. There were so many that could of became good friends with me.

Well, lets just move on now, innit?

Alot of regrets too .. I'm losing a friend, which I think I can't lose at all. One of my best friends, really. I don't know what that friend thinks me as, but I just see her as that. That friend's one of the only ones who put up with that much shit from me too, and one of those who put up with all those faults of mine.

Then there's another friend who's my good friend temporarily. That friend will talk to me and all when that friend is bored, but once that friend's other friends come, that friend will just leave me alone. Sad, eh?

/End rant.

I'll post something more interesting next time.

posted at : 11:50 PM

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Sunday, 10th January 2009, 8:56PM.

Yay, its my first post on this blog, and I've got everything sorted out now. In case you see something missing, please inform me on my tagbox.

I'll blog about my day, I guess.

Like the typical Sunday it is, my baby cousin came over to my house again. Funnily enough she's quietened down alot since my aunt went back to Malaysia. Sometimes I miss the screaming and running around. The only difference between today and other days was that my mum allowed me to get online. Yesterday, which was my usual online time I went out at night, so my mum pretty much allowed me to get online today just to make up for it.

Wait a minute there - Does it mean I'll only be posting every week? Hell no. I sneak online almost every afternoon if I can, and I'll try to blog about my day.

Nothing much happened online. Searched around for a new forum roleplay, posted in the threads I currently was and played Mousehunt. I wouldn't actually call clicking a horn every fifteen minutes playing but .. Yeah.

For the one hundredth time, I do not have a life. Most of my friends don't go out, and for those that actually go out, they have their other friends whom they prefer to go out with than me. So my social life is basically in pieces, my academics suck, and my physical health isn't too good either. All I've got is my sanity here - And its vanishing pretty fast.

Read some One Piece. Did I ever tell you guys how great a Manga it is? Of course not, its just my second post, god dammit. -Facepalm-

The fact that I actually rate it higher than Bleach and Naruto proves as much. My thoughts about One Piece is simple - They know the time and place for everything. Sometimes, One Piece can make you laugh your ass off. Sometimes, One Piece can actually make you cry - Its brought me to the verge of tears more than once, something that nothing else does. Not even Bodyguards and Assassins.

So other than that I didn't do much, except I went out a few hours before to buy dinner with my mum.

I realised that I was running out of books to read. Those books that I've read about thirty times, I got bored of. Those books that I've read about ten times, I'm getting bored of.

Ain't that a bitch.

posted at : 4:56 AM

Why do I even try?

You know, its pretty much the first post I've ever made on a blog - But its definitely NOT the first blog that I've ever made. I've tried making blogs in the past, and I kept giving up. Its either I was lazy, or that I hit an obstacle and didn't know what to do. I guess I'll try it out again one more time and see if I can succeed.

posted at : 4:04 AM

profile

Name's Chong Xu Cheng. I'm currently thirteen (fourteen on July) and I am studying in Anglican High School. Sad to say I'm overweight, but I'm not going to reveal my weight. Ever. All I'll say is that I stand at approximately one metre and seventy centimetres, maybe one or two centimetres left. I haven't measured it in a while.

Currently I'm single, though sometimes I wish I had a girlfriend, and sometimes I let out a sigh of relief I don't. I've had to help too many friends salvage their relationships and trust me, it isn't pretty.

likes/hates

Likes

Music. (Anything good, except for classical)

Reading. (Only Fantasy, Science-Fiction or action-packed ones)

Writing.

Habbohotel.

Combatarms.

Dislikes

Insects of any kind.

Bitchy girls. I mean, who doesn't?

MMORPGs. Especially Maplestory.

Too serious teachers.

Greatly unreasonable rules, like the ones my school has at the moment.

Old-fashioned people.

tagboard

links

Charis Tiffany